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AvS1Ap

see that aspiring model there?


that was me - deb - until the day i died.


i thought i'd go straight to heaven,

but there was a bit of a mix-up


and i woke up in someone else's body.


so now i'm jane,


a super-busy lawyer with my very own assistant.


i got a new life, a new wardrobe,


and the only people who really know what's going on with me


are my girlfriend stacy and my guardian angel, fred.


i used to think everything happened for a reason...

12 00:00:29,000 --> 00:00:32,199 ...and, well, i sure hope i was right.

13 00:00:32,200 --> 00:00:36,700 drop dead diva

14 00:00:37,000 --> 00:00:40,499 www.1000fr. com presents

15 00:00:40,500 --> 00:00:44,434 Capture: FRM@·ėĪµ Sync: FRS@J`cat

16 00:00:44,435 --> 00:00:46,899 i thought you were my friends.

17 00:00:46,900 --> 00:00:48,734 are you talking to your shoes?

18 00:00:48,735 --> 00:00:50,699 no. only a crazy person does that.

19 00:00:50,700 --> 00:00:52,599 i'm talking to my feet.

20 00:00:52,600 --> 00:00:54,599 you've completely betrayed me.

21 00:00:54,600 --> 00:00:56,899 ah, good. that's not crazy at all.

22 00:00:56,900 --> 00:00:59,099 they're not only shorter than my old feet,

23 00:00:59,100 --> 00:01:00,699 these puppies are wide.

24 00:01:00,700 --> 00:01:02,699 therefore providing better support.

25 00:01:02,700 --> 00:01:05,199 fred, i don't care about support,

26 00:01:05,200 --> 00:01:07,999 i care about raising my heels to shape my calves.

27 00:01:08,000 --> 00:01:11,299 i have been reading about these shoes for a year.

28 00:01:11,300 --> 00:01:14,520 i order them online, in my new size,

29 00:01:14,700 --> 00:01:16,199 and my feet are still too wide.

30 00:01:16,200 --> 00:01:18,199 so why don't you just give the shoes to stacy?

31 00:01:18,200 --> 00:01:21,434 or, better yet, why don't i give the shoes to stacy?

32 00:01:21,435 --> 00:01:22,799 - and then - - and then what?

33 00:01:22,800 --> 00:01:24,699 she'd fall madly in love with you?

34 00:01:24,700 --> 00:01:26,299 - give it up. - you know what?

35 00:01:26,300 --> 00:01:27,999 be mad at the shoes, not me, okay?

36 00:01:28,000 --> 00:01:30,299 besides, based on the dvd llection i saw in your old condo,

37 00:01:30,300 --> 00:01:32,299 the "old jane" waa huge romantic.

38 00:01:32,300 --> 00:01:34,299 and you know what i learned from those movies?

39 00:01:34,300 --> 00:01:37,134 that the female lead character wears twice as much makeup

40 00:01:37,135 --> 00:01:38,999 in the final scene than when we first meet her?

41 00:01:39,000 --> 00:01:41,365 no...that perseverance -

42 00:01:41,400 --> 00:01:45,399 and true love, but mainly perseverance - conquers all.

43 00:01:45,400 --> 00:01:47,834 you and stacy are a total mismatch.

44 00:01:47,835 --> 00:01:48,299 exactly!

45 00:01:48,300 --> 00:01:51,299 like tom hanks and meg ryan in "you've got mail."

46 00:01:51,300 --> 00:01:53,834 or tom hanks and meg ryan in "sleepless in seattle."

47 00:01:53,835 --> 00:01:55,400 or tom hanks -

48 00:01:55,500 --> 00:01:58,134 are guardian angels even allowed to date normal people?

49 00:01:58,135 --> 00:01:59,599 don't ask, don't tell.

50 00:01:59,600 --> 00:02:02,470 bingum, you got a client waiting.

51 00:02:04,800 --> 00:02:07,334 your movies have taught me everything i need to know

52 00:02:07,335 --> 00:02:09,399 about how to win stacy's heart.

53 00:02:09,400 --> 00:02:10,380 just watch.

54 00:02:14,300 --> 00:02:15,799 i miss my ankles.

55 00:02:15,800 --> 00:02:18,880 - his name is david beckham. - what?

56 00:02:19,400 --> 00:02:21,234 i just heard. david beckham's in the office?

57 00:02:21,235 --> 00:02:22,399 he's in the conference room.

58 00:02:22,400 --> 00:02:24,699 he needs a lawyer, and you two are on it.

59 00:02:24,700 --> 00:02:25,999 - second chair. - what?

60 00:02:26,000 --> 00:02:28,399 you - second chair. you are not ruining this for me.

61 00:02:28,400 --> 00:02:30,134 kim, he's married - posh spice, victoria beckham.

62 00:02:30,135 --> 00:02:31,599 i'm in love with the man, jane.

63 00:02:31,600 --> 00:02:33,999 i bought his aftershave, david beckham's instinct,

64 00:02:34,000 --> 00:02:36,299 just to spray his scent on my pillow.

65 00:02:36,300 --> 00:02:38,470 i will handle the client.

66 00:02:40,000 --> 00:02:42,599 hi, kim kaswell, lead attorney.

67 00:02:42,600 --> 00:02:43,899 my colleague, jane.

68 00:02:43,900 --> 00:02:45,930 so, where's our client?

69 00:02:47,000 --> 00:02:48,599 - uh, kim... - shh.

70 00:02:48,600 --> 00:02:50,630 - second chair. - kim...

71 00:02:52,900 --> 00:02:55,999 - that's david beckham? - i've always been a fan,

72 00:02:56,000 --> 00:02:58,099 and when he smiles, they kind of look alike.

73 00:02:58,100 --> 00:03:01,880 maybe he'll spray his scent on your pillow.

74 00:03:02,000 --> 00:03:03,484 well, you're a good boy.

75 00:03:03,485 --> 00:03:04,999 he's an ottoman with fur.

76 00:03:05,000 --> 00:03:07,799 i'm sorry. parker hasn't filled us in on this case.

77 00:03:07,800 --> 00:03:10,499 and i'm not really a dog person, so...

78 00:03:10,500 --> 00:03:12,134 david beckham is the only golden retriever

79 00:03:12,135 --> 00:03:13,699 ever to win the pedigree cup.

80 00:03:13,700 --> 00:03:16,199 sadly, he passed away last year.

81 00:03:16,200 --> 00:03:20,100 um, if he died, then what am i looking at?

82 00:03:20,200 --> 00:03:21,499 i had him cloned.

83 00:03:21,500 --> 00:03:23,699 - come on. - i know, it sounds like science fiction,

84 00:03:23,700 --> 00:03:25,699 but there are companies that do that now.

85 00:03:25,700 --> 00:03:27,199 it cost me 200 grand.

86 00:03:27,200 --> 00:03:29,099 but if you add up potential endorsements,

87 00:03:29,100 --> 00:03:32,299 it would have paid for itself - had it worked.

88 00:03:32,300 --> 00:03:34,284 does he look like the first david beckham?

89 00:03:34,285 --> 00:03:36,199 identical, but he never listens to me.

90 00:03:36,200 --> 00:03:38,199 he doesn't understand the simplest command.

91 00:03:38,200 --> 00:03:41,299 he just eats and sleeps and licks himself.

92 00:03:41,300 --> 00:03:43,190 - oh. - look at this.

93 00:03:43,600 --> 00:03:46,190 david beckham ii... come here.

94 00:03:51,000 --> 00:03:52,400 son of a bitch.

95 00:03:54,500 --> 00:03:56,199 i want my money back...

96 00:03:56,200 --> 00:03:57,400 every cent.

97 00:03:58,100 --> 00:03:59,360 i'll get him.

98 00:04:05,600 --> 00:04:08,500 come here.

99 00:04:09,900 --> 00:04:11,300 good boy.

100 00:04:26,500 --> 00:04:29,440 hi, i'm looking for grayson kent.

101 00:04:31,800 --> 00:04:34,880 grayson kent - he is a lawyer here.

102 00:04:41,100 --> 00:04:43,699 oh, bobbi, so good to see you.

103 00:04:43,700 --> 00:04:45,799 you too, darling. you too.

104 00:04:45,800 --> 00:04:47,100 how are you?

105 00:04:48,300 --> 00:04:49,140 you okay?

106 00:04:50,100 --> 00:04:52,410 right this way. thank you.

107 00:04:53,000 --> 00:04:54,050 that woman -

108 00:04:55,600 --> 00:04:56,930 she's my mom -

109 00:05:03,200 --> 00:05:05,399 i'm going in there. she's my mom.

110 00:05:05,400 --> 00:05:06,834 not anymore, jane, and i do mean "jane."

111 00:05:06,835 --> 00:05:07,699 you know the rules.

112 00:05:07,700 --> 00:05:10,134 i am not going to tell her who i am.

113 00:05:10,135 --> 00:05:11,115 oh, really?

114 00:05:12,100 --> 00:05:13,399 so what if i do tell her?

115 00:05:13,400 --> 00:05:14,999 i told stacy, and nothing bad happened.

116 00:05:15,000 --> 00:05:17,034 yeah, because i covered for you, and i'm not gonna do it again.

117 00:05:17,035 --> 00:05:18,500 she is my mom.

118 00:05:18,900 --> 00:05:21,199 we were close, best-friend close.

119 00:05:21,200 --> 00:05:23,734 we told each other everything. maybe she'd understand.

120 00:05:23,735 --> 00:05:26,299 yeah, or maybe you'll send her screaming into a loony bin.

121 00:05:26,300 --> 00:05:28,134 people are not supposed to come back to life.

122 00:05:28,135 --> 00:05:29,899 she misses deb, and you're not deb.

123 00:05:29,900 --> 00:05:31,020 you're jane.

124 00:05:31,400 --> 00:05:32,660 i'm going in.

125 00:05:36,500 --> 00:05:37,200 hi.

126 00:05:41,400 --> 00:05:41,900 jane?

127 00:05:43,700 --> 00:05:45,400 that's me. um...

128 00:05:46,700 --> 00:05:48,700 - jane bingum. - hi.

129 00:05:49,500 --> 00:05:50,934 we're kind of in the middle of something here.

130 00:05:50,935 --> 00:05:52,699 which is why i interrupted.

131 00:05:52,700 --> 00:05:55,084 grayson, while a phenomenal lawyer,

132 00:05:55,085 --> 00:05:57,434 is still new to the firm, miss...

133 00:05:57,435 --> 00:05:58,555 mrs. dobkins.

134 00:05:59,300 --> 00:06:01,900 - call me bobbi. - bobbi.

135 00:06:02,800 --> 00:06:04,834 i thought you might require additional assistance

136 00:06:04,835 --> 00:06:06,599 with your legal needs.

137 00:06:06,600 --> 00:06:08,399 well, i was kind of counting on grayson,

138 00:06:08,400 --> 00:06:11,499 but he just informed me that he cannot be my lawyer.

139 00:06:11,500 --> 00:06:14,234 - jane, bobbi is deb's mother, so - - i see.

140 00:06:14,235 --> 00:06:16,934 and that's why you're not gonna represent her?

141 00:06:16,935 --> 00:06:18,699 no. i'm already representing her husband.

142 00:06:18,700 --> 00:06:20,730 you're both in trouble?

143 00:06:21,700 --> 00:06:24,640 no, we're just getting a divorce.

144 00:06:25,800 --> 00:06:26,400 why?

145 00:06:28,500 --> 00:06:29,999 it's deb, isn't it?

146 00:06:30,000 --> 00:06:31,499 because she passed away.

147 00:06:31,500 --> 00:06:35,099 are you okay? i'm so sorry for your loss.

148 00:06:35,100 --> 00:06:37,634 major tragedies often heighten emotional tensions.

149 00:06:37,635 --> 00:06:40,299 grief makes people do crazy things.

150 00:06:40,300 --> 00:06:42,334 i think you should give yourselves another chance,

151 00:06:42,335 --> 00:06:44,051 take some time to really think about it.

152 00:06:44,052 --> 00:06:45,699 jane, can i see you outside, please?

153 00:06:45,700 --> 00:06:47,034 i really think i need to hear the whole story.

154 00:06:47,035 --> 00:06:48,101 - jane. - no, it's all right.

155 00:06:48,102 --> 00:06:49,099 i don't mind talking about it.

156 00:06:49,100 --> 00:06:50,699 i understand, bobbi, but the problem is

157 00:06:50,700 --> 00:06:53,299 i can't hear it because i can't represent you.

158 00:06:53,300 --> 00:06:54,799 - i can. - excuse me?

159 00:06:54,800 --> 00:06:56,784 if you'd like, i have time, mrs. dobkins.

160 00:06:56,785 --> 00:06:58,799 if you need a lawyer, i can represent you.

161 00:06:58,800 --> 00:07:00,599 - absolutely not. - i'd love that.

162 00:07:00,600 --> 00:07:04,450 - okay. now we're going outside. - all right.

163 00:07:05,400 --> 00:07:06,534 i want to know what just happened in there.

164 00:07:06,535 --> 00:07:07,999 a client hired a lawyer.

165 00:07:08,000 --> 00:07:09,434 - my client. - she wasn't your client.

166 00:07:09,435 --> 00:07:10,899 you said you couldn't represent her.

167 00:07:10,900 --> 00:07:13,034 we w hk at the same firm. we can't represent both parties.

168 00:07:13,035 --> 00:07:15,135 that's not correct. oh!

169 00:07:15,200 --> 00:07:16,699 it's called the chinese wall.

170 00:07:16,700 --> 00:07:18,834 we institute a metaphorical barricade within the firm

171 00:07:18,835 --> 00:07:20,299 to prevent conflict of interest.

172 00:07:20,300 --> 00:07:22,099 as soon as it goes up, all communications,

173 00:07:22,100 --> 00:07:24,999 paperwork, and discourse between opposing counsel is disallowed.

174 00:07:25,000 --> 00:07:26,434 god, i never get used to that.

175 00:07:26,435 --> 00:07:27,599 this is crazy.

176 00:07:27,600 --> 00:07:28,899 i'm going with bingum on this one.

177 00:07:28,900 --> 00:07:31,399 two clients means double the fee on one divorce.

178 00:07:31,400 --> 00:07:33,010 love those chinese.

179 00:07:34,700 --> 00:07:35,680 okay, fine.

180 00:07:36,200 --> 00:07:39,299 but you need to know that these clients are very important to me.

181 00:07:39,300 --> 00:07:40,770 i would hope so.

182 00:07:47,800 --> 00:07:49,499 what are we looking at here?

183 00:07:49,500 --> 00:07:52,399 this is a video i put together for david beckham's -

184 00:07:52,400 --> 00:07:53,984 the first david beckham's - funeral.

185 00:07:53,985 --> 00:07:56,399 gives you a sense of his abilities.

186 00:07:56,400 --> 00:07:59,999 objection, your honor. a funeral video with a soundtrack?

187 00:08:00,000 --> 00:08:01,499 more prejudicial than probative.

188 00:08:01,500 --> 00:08:03,234 your honor, if we're going to prove that the new dog

189 00:08:03,235 --> 00:08:04,399 is nothing like the original,

190 00:08:04,400 --> 00:08:06,299 then the jury needs to meet the original.

191 00:08:06,300 --> 00:08:07,200 overruled.

192 00:08:07,300 --> 00:08:09,799 but make your point, counselor.

193 00:08:09,800 --> 00:08:11,899 in the 2007 pedigree cup,

194 00:08:11,900 --> 00:08:14,499 how did david beckham i perform?

195 00:08:14,500 --> 00:08:16,699 green ribbon. perfect 10's from every judge.

196 00:08:16,700 --> 00:08:17,899 the rerter from "canine magazine"

197 00:08:17,900 --> 00:08:20,499 called him "extremely intelligent and responsive."

198 00:08:20,500 --> 00:08:21,599 this year's pedigree cup

199 00:08:21,600 --> 00:08:25,660 is happening right now here in town, isn't it?

200 00:08:27,000 --> 00:08:28,199 why aren't you there?

201 00:08:28,200 --> 00:08:32,499 that's because david beckham ii didn't win any of qualifiers.

202 00:08:32,500 --> 00:08:34,499 he didn't qualify for any of the qualifiers,

203 00:08:34,500 --> 00:08:37,499 despite exactly same training regime as david beckham i.

204 00:08:37,500 --> 00:08:40,499 in fact, at a conformation show in phoenix,

205 00:08:40,500 --> 00:08:43,440 he ate one of the judge's shoes.

206 00:08:46,100 --> 00:08:47,430 nothing further.

207 00:08:49,300 --> 00:08:51,470 mr. haft, i'm no expert,

208 00:08:51,500 --> 00:08:53,834 but that dog looks pretty darn identical

209 00:08:53,835 --> 00:08:56,705 to the pooch sitting right there.

210 00:08:59,200 --> 00:09:01,234 you could put a hyundai engine in a porsche,

211 00:09:01,235 --> 00:09:02,299 and you'll think it's a porsche

212 00:09:02,300 --> 00:09:03,999 right up until the moment you try to drive it.

213 00:09:04,000 --> 00:09:05,499 but isn't it possible that the problem

214 00:09:05,500 --> 00:09:09,499 lies not with the dog at all but with the driver?

215 00:09:09,500 --> 00:09:10,899 i'm not following you.

216 00:09:10,900 --> 00:09:14,099 you say you trained the two dogs in exactly the same way.

217 00:09:14,100 --> 00:09:15,534 but you're not the same man you were

218 00:09:15,535 --> 00:09:17,499 when you trained the first dog, are you?

219 00:09:17,500 --> 00:09:20,399 you're grieving, maybe a little depressed.

220 00:09:20,400 --> 00:09:22,710 you clearly miss beckham i.

221 00:09:22,900 --> 00:09:26,610 maybe...this little guy never had a chance.

222 00:09:29,500 --> 00:09:32,134 i paid $200,000 for a clone of my dog,

223 00:09:32,135 --> 00:09:34,235 and that is not my dog.

224 00:09:34,300 --> 00:09:35,630 nothing further.

225 00:09:42,800 --> 00:09:44,399 slow down. what's going on?

226 00:09:44,400 --> 00:09:46,034 there was a weirdo at the courthouse,

227 00:09:46,035 --> 00:09:47,299 and i think he followed me out.

228 00:09:47,300 --> 00:09:48,699 ooh. what kind of weirdo?

229 00:09:48,700 --> 00:09:50,899 a weirdo in uniform. a bailiff.

230 00:09:50,900 --> 00:09:53,799 oh, no. did he have a receding hairline, long-ish face,

231 00:09:53,800 --> 00:09:57,200 - kind of goofy grin? - yeah. why?

232 00:09:57,300 --> 00:09:58,599 that's hank, the bailiff.

233 00:09:58,600 --> 00:10:00,599 he's been crushing on you for, like, a year.

234 00:10:00,600 --> 00:10:02,434 he has a crush on me? ew.

235 00:10:02,435 --> 00:10:04,299 don't act so surprised.

236 00:10:04,300 --> 00:10:06,099 you actually went out two or three times.

237 00:10:06,100 --> 00:10:07,699 couple nights before you were shot,

238 00:10:07,700 --> 00:10:09,240 there was kissing.

239 00:10:09,500 --> 00:10:14,330 he's probably wondering why you haven't called him back.

240 00:10:15,400 --> 00:10:18,399 apparently, old jane kissed a bailiff.

241 00:10:18,400 --> 00:10:19,590 good for her.

242 00:10:19,700 --> 00:10:22,299 hey, any idea how he wooed you?

243 00:10:22,300 --> 00:10:22,800 what?

244 00:10:22,900 --> 00:10:25,999 46 romantic comedies later, and i've narrowed it down.

245 00:10:26,000 --> 00:10:27,499 here's how the guy gets the girl -

246 00:10:27,500 --> 00:10:29,199 a last-minute race to the airport

247 00:10:29,200 --> 00:10:32,999 or a humiliatingut heartfelt public declaration of love,

248 00:10:33,000 --> 00:10:34,699 often in the form of a song.

249 00:10:34,700 --> 00:10:36,834 fred. what are you doing with a -

250 00:10:36,835 --> 00:10:39,265 stacy-y-y

251 00:10:39,300 --> 00:10:42,400 you drive me crazy-y-y

252 00:10:43,500 --> 00:10:44,830 don't do that.

253 00:10:45,100 --> 00:10:47,399 mrs. dobkins is in the conference room.

254 00:10:47,400 --> 00:10:48,100 why?

255 00:10:48,600 --> 00:10:51,699 dobkins settlement conference i texted you.

256 00:10:51,700 --> 00:10:55,130 that means... mr. dobkins will be there?

257 00:10:55,500 --> 00:10:57,999 hard to have a divorce without a husband.

258 00:10:58,000 --> 00:10:59,190 are you okay?

259 00:10:59,900 --> 00:11:02,300 yeah. i'll be right there.

260 00:11:04,400 --> 00:11:06,710 jane, this is a bad idea.

261 00:11:06,800 --> 00:11:08,199 i can handle it.

262 00:11:08,200 --> 00:11:11,499 we'll take care of this quickly. it won't be long.

263 00:11:11,500 --> 00:11:13,599 oh, jane bingum, bobbi's attorney.

264 00:11:13,600 --> 00:11:15,699 jane, i'd like you to meet my client, joe dobkins.

265 00:11:15,700 --> 00:11:16,399 . bingum.

266 00:11:16,400 --> 00:11:18,150 it is so nice to...

267 00:11:20,400 --> 00:11:23,600 - whoa. - i'm sorry.

268 00:11:23,900 --> 00:11:26,910 we're just that kind of law firm.

269 00:11:27,000 --> 00:11:30,100 just one big, happy family.

270 00:11:30,500 --> 00:11:32,800 isn't that...right?

271 00:11:36,700 --> 00:11:38,730 now, let's get started.

272 00:11:39,100 --> 00:11:41,899 joe has provided us with a list of assets.

273 00:11:41,900 --> 00:11:42,899 i brought one, too.

274 00:11:42,900 --> 00:11:45,699 wait, wait, wait. let's slow things down.

275 00:11:45,700 --> 00:11:46,099 jane...

276 00:11:46,100 --> 00:11:48,999 i just think we may have missed a step in the process.

277 00:11:49,000 --> 00:11:50,399 which step would that be, hon?

278 00:11:50,400 --> 00:11:51,300 mediation.

279 00:11:52,100 --> 00:11:54,999 i mean, have you two really thought this through?

280 00:11:55,000 --> 00:11:58,400 26 years of marriage is a long time.

281 00:11:58,500 --> 00:11:59,970 is she for real?

282 00:12:00,300 --> 00:12:04,430 my lawyer has a heart. that's very sweet, jane.

283 00:12:04,500 --> 00:12:06,099 but we know what we're doing.

284 00:12:06,100 --> 00:12:08,600 bobbi, joe...

285 00:12:09,100 --> 00:12:11,499 i know that this is unorthodox,

286 00:12:11,500 --> 00:12:14,865 but maybe if you sat down and talked -

287 00:12:14,900 --> 00:12:17,299 jane, i'm going to need to see you in private.

288 00:12:17,300 --> 00:12:18,000 now.

289 00:12:20,100 --> 00:12:21,099 i know you have seniority here,

290 00:12:21,100 --> 00:12:22,834 but i love these people like my own parents,

291 00:12:22,835 --> 00:12:23,699 and you're upsetting them!

292 00:12:23,700 --> 00:12:26,199 isn't it our obligation, as their advocates,

293 00:12:26,200 --> 00:12:28,634 to provide our clients with an opportunity to work things out?

294 00:12:28,635 --> 00:12:30,399 they didn't hire us to work things out.

295 00:12:30,400 --> 00:12:32,534 but look at them. they belong together.

296 00:12:32,535 --> 00:12:33,999 actually, they don't.

297 00:12:34,000 --> 00:12:34,999 joe wants out of this marriage.

298 00:12:35,000 --> 00:12:36,699 we've been talking about it for months.

299 00:12:36,700 --> 00:12:37,800 months?

300 00:12:38,600 --> 00:12:40,350 don't be ridiculous.

301 00:12:41,400 --> 00:12:43,834 this was probably brought on by deb's passing.

302 00:12:43,835 --> 00:12:45,499 it's common to sublimate grief.

303 00:12:45,500 --> 00:12:49,490 jane, joe came to me well before the accident.

304 00:12:49,800 --> 00:12:50,400 what?

305 00:12:53,100 --> 00:12:54,800 you never told deb.

306 00:12:56,900 --> 00:12:58,790 how do you know that?

307 00:12:59,200 --> 00:12:59,830 well...

308 00:13:00,700 --> 00:13:03,399 'cause if you did, she'd have told her mother.

309 00:13:03,400 --> 00:13:04,699 it seems they shared everything.

310 00:13:04,700 --> 00:13:07,099 and bobbi just found out last week, when joe told her.

311 00:13:07,100 --> 00:13:08,934 he asked me not to say anything.

312 00:13:08,935 --> 00:13:12,085 it's a divorce. he has his reasons.

313 00:13:12,600 --> 00:13:14,499 so you didn't tell deb

314 00:13:14,500 --> 00:13:17,580 because he asked you to keep quiet?

315 00:13:17,700 --> 00:13:19,800 something that important,

316 00:13:20,200 --> 00:13:21,880 you kept from her -

317 00:13:22,100 --> 00:13:24,830 the woman you were gonna marry.

318 00:13:25,100 --> 00:13:27,340 what's going on with you?

319 00:13:38,900 --> 00:13:41,299 i don't know. i mean, grayson's a lawyer.

320 00:13:41,300 --> 00:13:42,199 maybe he took a vow

321 00:13:42,200 --> 00:13:46,299 not to share a client's personal information with his girlfriend.

322 00:13:46,300 --> 00:13:48,400 are you taking his side?

323 00:13:48,500 --> 00:13:51,199 i'm on your side. he's a jerk.

324 00:13:51,200 --> 00:13:52,110 thank you.

325 00:13:52,200 --> 00:13:54,370 keep pacing. good cardio.

326 00:13:54,800 --> 00:13:56,099 he lied to me.

327 00:13:56,100 --> 00:13:58,234 well, technically, he didn't lie to you.

328 00:13:58,235 --> 00:13:59,199 he lied to deb.

329 00:13:59,200 --> 00:14:01,634 and technically, it's not really a lie.

330 00:14:01,635 --> 00:14:04,645 he just didn't tell you something.

331 00:14:05,000 --> 00:14:07,699 sorry. technically, he's a jerk.

332 00:14:07,700 --> 00:14:10,399 it is called a lie by omission.

333 00:14:10,400 --> 00:14:12,434 i have discovered so many more types of lies

334 00:14:12,435 --> 00:14:14,299 since becoming a lawyer.

335 00:14:14,300 --> 00:14:16,799 at least the divorce isn't your fault.

336 00:14:16,800 --> 00:14:18,234 your dad planned on leaving your mom

337 00:14:18,235 --> 00:14:19,899 way before your accident.

338 00:14:19,900 --> 00:14:22,199 my parents are splitting up,

339 00:14:22,200 --> 00:14:26,960 and my almost-fianc? knew about it and didn't tell me.

340 00:14:27,200 --> 00:14:29,599 how do you find the silver lining in that?

341 00:14:29,600 --> 00:14:30,790 it's a gift.

342 00:14:31,300 --> 00:14:32,399 look, sweetie,

343 00:14:32,400 --> 00:14:35,099 if grayson had told you, what would you have done?

344 00:14:35,100 --> 00:14:37,434 i would have told my mom. and he knew that.

345 00:14:37,435 --> 00:14:39,751 well, my dad didn't want my mom to know.

346 00:14:39,752 --> 00:14:42,399 and as a lawyer, i know what that means.

347 00:14:42,400 --> 00:14:43,660 i'm listening.

348 00:14:43,800 --> 00:14:47,999 he was probably taking extra time to hide his assets.

349 00:14:48,000 --> 00:14:50,899 well, i'm not gonna let him get away with it.

350 00:14:50,900 --> 00:14:53,434 your mom has no idea how lucky she is

351 00:14:53,435 --> 00:14:55,605 to have you as a lawyer.

352 00:14:56,000 --> 00:14:56,999 silver lining!

353 00:14:57,000 --> 00:14:59,300 there i go again. hmm.

354 00:15:01,800 --> 00:15:04,099 bobbi, california's a no-fault state,

355 00:15:04,100 --> 00:15:06,399 which means marital assets are split equally.

356 00:15:06,400 --> 00:15:10,134 but if one party has advance notice, they can hide assets.

357 00:15:10,135 --> 00:15:12,599 but that does not really sound like him.

358 00:15:12,600 --> 00:15:14,734 well, unfortunately, as i've recently learned,

359 00:15:14,735 --> 00:15:16,765 people can surprise you.

360 00:15:16,800 --> 00:15:18,234 you have the tahoe condo on the list,

361 00:15:18,235 --> 00:15:20,335 but what about the jeep?

362 00:15:20,400 --> 00:15:23,200 how do you know about the jeep?

363 00:15:23,600 --> 00:15:26,470 every condo in tahoe has a jeep.

364 00:15:27,800 --> 00:15:29,699 he can have them both.

365 00:15:29,700 --> 00:15:30,599 what? why?

366 00:15:30,600 --> 00:15:32,834 because he loves the place, and i don't ski.

367 00:15:32,835 --> 00:15:35,845 then you'll learn. listen, bobbi...

368 00:15:36,600 --> 00:15:40,170 it's time you did something for yourself.

369 00:15:43,000 --> 00:15:44,599 did you ever meet my daughter?

370 00:15:44,600 --> 00:15:47,500 - uh, grayson's girlfriend? - no.

371 00:15:48,900 --> 00:15:52,680 but from what i've heard, she was terrific.

372 00:15:53,200 --> 00:15:54,460 yeah, she was.

373 00:15:56,900 --> 00:15:58,699 you know, she was a pageant girl

374 00:15:58,700 --> 00:16:01,099 right up into her teens, and she did pretty well.

375 00:16:01,100 --> 00:16:02,634 and i would shuttle her back and forth

376 00:16:02,635 --> 00:16:04,665 between the competitions.

377 00:16:05,500 --> 00:16:07,099 the whole time, she'd be on my case,

378 00:16:07,100 --> 00:16:11,510 saying, "mom, you got to do something for yourself."

379 00:16:13,800 --> 00:16:16,950 you know what? i do want the condo.

380 00:16:17,300 --> 00:16:18,490 there you go.

381 00:16:19,300 --> 00:16:23,570 now let's take a look at the rest of this list.

382 00:16:26,200 --> 00:16:28,200 - hey, stacy. - hey...

383 00:16:28,800 --> 00:16:30,800 - you. - it's fred.

384 00:16:31,000 --> 00:16:33,899 oh. well, jane's at work right now, so if you -

385 00:16:33,900 --> 00:16:35,834 oh, well - well, actually, um, i-i won-

386 00:16:35,835 --> 00:16:37,899 i was wondering if - if you wanted to -

387 00:16:37,900 --> 00:16:40,800 uh...i -here goes.

388 00:16:40,900 --> 00:16:43,299 there's this girl named stacy

389 00:16:43,300 --> 00:16:44,634 and she drives me crazy

390 00:16:44,635 --> 00:16:45,899 oh, i-i have to take this.

391 00:16:45,900 --> 00:16:47,899 uh, should i tell jane that you stopped by?

392 00:16:47,900 --> 00:16:50,299 - uh, actually, n-no. - okay.

393 00:16:50,300 --> 00:16:52,434 i'll see you later, then... you.

394 00:16:52,435 --> 00:16:55,200 i...it's fred.

395 00:16:56,300 --> 00:16:57,799 it's just - just fred.

396 00:16:57,800 --> 00:16:59,800 one little...syllable.

397 00:17:00,500 --> 00:17:02,299 what the hell is this?

398 00:17:02,300 --> 00:17:04,134 a revised asset distribution list.

399 00:17:04,135 --> 00:17:06,099 the condo in tahoe? the jeep?

400 00:17:06,100 --> 00:17:07,640 joe's golf clubs?

401 00:17:08,200 --> 00:17:10,699 - bobbi doesn't golf. - not yet.

402 00:17:10,700 --> 00:17:12,199 what's going on here?

403 00:17:12,200 --> 00:17:14,734 will you please inform mr. kent that the chinese wall

404 00:17:14,735 --> 00:17:17,234 precludes any informal discourse between attorneys

405 00:17:17,235 --> 00:17:18,845 regarding the case.

406 00:17:19,000 --> 00:17:19,999 what she said.

407 00:17:20,000 --> 00:17:21,399 why have we suddenly gone scorched earth

408 00:17:21,400 --> 00:17:23,299 on what's supposed to be an amicable divorce?

409 00:17:23,300 --> 00:17:24,299 chinese wall.

410 00:17:24,300 --> 00:17:27,299 is this coming from you or the client?

411 00:17:27,300 --> 00:17:28,420 chinese wall.

412 00:17:31,600 --> 00:17:34,330 don't look at me. i'm korean.

413 00:17:35,100 --> 00:17:37,434 dr. huxley, would you read the highlighted portion

414 00:17:37,435 --> 00:17:38,905 of your brochure?

415 00:17:39,400 --> 00:17:42,399 "what if you never had to say goodbye to your best friend?

416 00:17:42,400 --> 00:17:44,799 "bff biotech offers you a second chance

417 00:17:44,800 --> 00:17:46,699 and your dog a second life."

418 00:17:46,700 --> 00:17:49,234 and where would a pet owner find a brochure like this?

419 00:17:49,235 --> 00:17:51,199 we distribute these at veterinary hospitals.

420 00:17:51,200 --> 00:17:54,134 where they're likely to be read by grief-stricken dog owners

421 00:17:54,135 --> 00:17:55,199 who, in their hour of desperation,

422 00:17:55,200 --> 00:17:57,199 would pay anything to get their dead dog back.

423 00:17:57,200 --> 00:17:59,234 objection, your honor. counsel is testifying.

424 00:17:59,235 --> 00:18:00,075 withdrawn.

425 00:18:01,000 --> 00:18:03,834 dr. huxley, is it possible for a cloned dog

426 00:18:03,835 --> 00:18:05,899 to look like the original dog

427 00:18:05,900 --> 00:18:08,099 but share no other personality traits?

428 00:18:08,100 --> 00:18:11,134 yes, environment dictates personality as much as dna.

429 00:18:11,135 --> 00:18:13,599 so a customer could spend $200,000

430 00:18:13,600 --> 00:18:15,099 and get a dog with a personality

431 00:18:15,100 --> 00:18:18,399 that is nothing like their best friend.

432 00:18:18,400 --> 00:18:19,999 that could happen, yes.

433 00:18:20,000 --> 00:18:22,399 and where does it say that in your brochure?

434 00:18:22,400 --> 00:18:23,450 it doesn't.

435 00:18:24,900 --> 00:18:26,230 nothing further.

436 00:18:26,500 --> 00:18:28,099 redirect, your honor.

437 00:18:28,100 --> 00:18:29,220 dr. huxley...

438 00:18:29,700 --> 00:18:32,570 how was david beckham ii created?

439 00:18:32,700 --> 00:18:36,899 our scientist used skin cells from beckham i to extract dna

440 00:18:36,900 --> 00:18:39,999 which they then fused with an egg to create a clone.

441 00:18:40,000 --> 00:18:40,630 i see.

442 00:18:40,700 --> 00:18:43,699 in the sales contract that your clients sign,

443 00:18:43,700 --> 00:18:45,799 what does it say about personality traits?

444 00:18:45,800 --> 00:18:49,699 it states that we cannot guarantee specific traits.

445 00:18:49,700 --> 00:18:51,634 did wallace haft sign this contract?

446 00:18:51,635 --> 00:18:52,200 yes.

447 00:18:52,300 --> 00:18:55,199 and did you supply him with an exact genetic clone?

448 00:18:55,200 --> 00:18:55,900 yes.

449 00:18:56,000 --> 00:18:59,399 in fact, the dna match has been verified by three labs.

450 00:18:59,400 --> 00:19:03,099 we'd like to enter the results as exhibits "a," "b," and "c."

451 00:19:03,100 --> 00:19:06,299 and now, your honor, the defense moves for a directed verdict.

452 00:19:06,300 --> 00:19:07,299 - excuse me! - objection!

453 00:19:07,300 --> 00:19:10,399 we all feel badly for mr. haft's loss.

454 00:19:10,400 --> 00:19:13,599 he misses his dog... and the endorsements,

455 00:19:13,600 --> 00:19:16,534 but the plaintiff hasn't provided an iota of evidence

456 00:19:16,535 --> 00:19:17,599 of any wrongdoing.

457 00:19:17,600 --> 00:19:19,499 i'm inclined to agree.

458 00:19:19,500 --> 00:19:20,340 counsel...

459 00:19:20,700 --> 00:19:24,200 - do you have anything else? - absolutely.

460 00:19:24,200 --> 00:19:25,810 and that would be?

461 00:19:27,300 --> 00:19:28,400 um...

462 00:19:31,200 --> 00:19:33,199 i'll tell you what that would be.

463 00:19:33,200 --> 00:19:34,799 these "indepennt dna tests -"

464 00:19:34,800 --> 00:19:36,599 are we just gonna take his word for it?

465 00:19:36,600 --> 00:19:38,299 how does the court know they're reliable?

466 00:19:38,300 --> 00:19:40,699 they are from three of the top labs in the state.

467 00:19:40,700 --> 00:19:41,900 so what?

468 00:19:42,000 --> 00:19:45,034 everyone knows that you don't pick a hair stylist

469 00:19:45,035 --> 00:19:46,499 by the name of the salon.

470 00:19:46,500 --> 00:19:50,000 it's the individual stylist that matters.

471 00:19:51,100 --> 00:19:53,099 so you want the defense

472 00:19:53,100 --> 00:19:55,834 to provide the qualifications of the technicians

473 00:19:55,835 --> 00:19:57,299 that ran the dna tests.

474 00:19:57,300 --> 00:19:59,599 - we demand it. - no problem, your honor.

475 00:19:59,600 --> 00:20:02,599 shouldn't take more than a day or two.

476 00:20:02,600 --> 00:20:05,680 you will have your directed verdict.

477 00:20:06,600 --> 00:20:08,499 i didn't freeze, if that's what you were thinking.

478 00:20:08,500 --> 00:20:09,599 i wasn't thinking that at all.

479 00:20:09,600 --> 00:20:11,699 i was lining up our argument... in my head.

480 00:20:11,700 --> 00:20:12,899 i figured as much.

481 00:20:12,900 --> 00:20:15,099 i was just buying us time so you could make that argument.

482 00:20:15,100 --> 00:20:16,499 right. that's what i figured.

483 00:20:16,500 --> 00:20:18,399 so what are we coming back in with?

484 00:20:18,400 --> 00:20:19,400 no idea.

485 00:20:19,700 --> 00:20:21,500 jane! hi.

486 00:20:22,600 --> 00:20:24,600 um, i have, um...

487 00:20:25,000 --> 00:20:29,399 business on another case, so i'll just see you back at the office.

488 00:20:29,400 --> 00:20:31,640 whatever floats your boat.

489 00:20:33,900 --> 00:20:35,100 so...

490 00:20:35,700 --> 00:20:38,099 i think i maybe owe you an apology.

491 00:20:38,100 --> 00:20:39,934 because i sent you flowers after you were shot

492 00:20:39,935 --> 00:20:40,999 and you never thanked me?

493 00:20:41,000 --> 00:20:43,660 no. i'm mean, yes, of course.

494 00:20:43,700 --> 00:20:46,400 thank you for those flowers.

495 00:20:47,200 --> 00:20:47,999 what's going on?

496 00:20:48,000 --> 00:20:50,299 i thought things were going well with us.

497 00:20:50,300 --> 00:20:51,200 yeah.

498 00:20:51,600 --> 00:20:54,299 i'm just wondering if maybe we should...

499 00:20:54,300 --> 00:20:55,299 slow it down.

500 00:20:55,300 --> 00:20:58,800 okay, but it can't get much slower.

501 00:20:59,100 --> 00:21:01,499 we've had three dinners in two years.

502 00:21:01,500 --> 00:21:03,699 i see my accountant more frequently than that.

503 00:21:03,700 --> 00:21:05,730 i think what happened...

504 00:21:06,400 --> 00:21:07,200 hank...

505 00:21:07,300 --> 00:21:10,000 maybe it took me by surprise

506 00:21:10,035 --> 00:21:12,700 when, you know, you kissed me.

507 00:21:13,100 --> 00:21:14,710 when i kissed you?

508 00:21:17,000 --> 00:21:19,699 - jane, you kissed me. - i did?

509 00:21:19,700 --> 00:21:21,300 pretty sure, yeah.

510 00:21:22,100 --> 00:21:24,099 outside the hamburger hamlet.

511 00:21:24,100 --> 00:21:26,499 we were waiting for our cars, and...

512 00:21:26,500 --> 00:21:29,370 bam, you just planted one on me.

513 00:21:30,300 --> 00:21:31,999 that not how you remember it?

514 00:21:32,000 --> 00:21:34,800 that evening is kind of a blur.

515 00:21:35,000 --> 00:21:36,799 i know what you mean.

516 00:21:36,800 --> 00:21:39,180 so, uh, what do you think?

517 00:21:39,200 --> 00:21:43,099 you want to go out again and have another blur?

518 00:21:43,100 --> 00:21:45,900 can i get back to you on that?

519 00:21:47,100 --> 00:21:49,410 you know where to find me.

520 00:21:51,400 --> 00:21:55,100 okay...i kissed him.

521 00:21:55,400 --> 00:21:56,000 what?

522 00:21:56,200 --> 00:21:59,000 the bailiff. he didn't kiss me.

523 00:21:59,100 --> 00:22:00,290 i kissed him.

524 00:22:00,400 --> 00:22:03,199 awesome. was there tongue? i got to update my blog.

525 00:22:03,200 --> 00:22:05,499 - teri. - kidding. there's no blog...

526 00:22:05,500 --> 00:22:07,250 as far as you know.

527 00:22:07,500 --> 00:22:10,440 i wouldn't go in there just yet.

528 00:22:11,800 --> 00:22:13,130 - aaah! - aaah!

529 00:22:13,900 --> 00:22:15,499 what the hell are you doing?

530 00:22:15,500 --> 00:22:17,899 "an officer and a gentleman." 1982.

531 00:22:17,900 --> 00:22:19,534 voted the most romantic movie of all time

532 00:22:19,535 --> 00:22:21,299 by dozens of internet newsgroups.

533 00:22:21,300 --> 00:22:23,999 i am gonna show up at stacy's place of employment,

534 00:22:24,000 --> 00:22:26,534 sweep her off her feet to the cheers of her colleagues,

535 00:22:26,535 --> 00:22:28,425 and she will be mine.

536 00:22:28,600 --> 00:22:29,599 great plan or what?

537 00:22:29,600 --> 00:22:31,280 okay, first of all,

538 00:22:31,300 --> 00:22:33,099 stacy doesn't have a place of employment.

539 00:22:33,100 --> 00:22:35,199 yeah, i know, but she's got yoga

540 00:22:35,200 --> 00:22:36,534 mondays, wednesdays, and fridays,

541 00:22:36,535 --> 00:22:38,299 so i'll just show up there.

542 00:22:38,300 --> 00:22:40,734 second, richard gere wasn't a stalker.

543 00:22:40,735 --> 00:22:41,399 okay, good point.

544 00:22:41,400 --> 00:22:44,299 and third, stacy's been kickboxing since she was 12.

545 00:22:44,300 --> 00:22:45,934 you try and sweep her off her feet,

546 00:22:45,935 --> 00:22:48,525 you're gonna lose some teeth.

547 00:22:48,900 --> 00:22:52,399 so, i guess i should... return my uniform.

548 00:22:52,400 --> 00:22:53,799 i rented it by the hour.

549 00:22:53,800 --> 00:22:55,799 fred, forget the movies.

550 00:22:55,800 --> 00:22:56,699 they're not real life.

551 00:22:56,700 --> 00:22:58,334 i got to do something, though.

552 00:22:58,335 --> 00:23:01,345 she doesn't even remember my name.

553 00:23:02,700 --> 00:23:04,099 fred, you forgot your cellphone.

554 00:23:04,100 --> 00:23:06,690 oh, i don't have a cellphone.

555 00:23:15,400 --> 00:23:16,000 hello?

556 00:23:16,200 --> 00:23:17,599 hey, just checking in.

557 00:23:17,600 --> 00:23:21,099 is it all signed yet? are you finally all mine?

558 00:23:21,100 --> 00:23:22,220 who is this?

559 00:23:23,200 --> 00:23:25,499 i'm sorry. i might have the wrong number.

560 00:23:25,500 --> 00:23:27,600 who are you calling for?

561 00:23:28,000 --> 00:23:29,600 bobbi dobkins.

562 00:23:32,700 --> 00:23:35,334 this is bobbi's lawyer. who am i speaking to?

563 00:23:35,335 --> 00:23:39,600 oh, uh... just tell her richard called.

564 00:23:43,900 --> 00:23:46,210 jane, everything all right?

565 00:23:46,400 --> 00:23:47,300 no.

566 00:23:49,300 --> 00:23:53,099 remember when i thought my mom told me everything?

567 00:23:53,100 --> 00:23:53,900 yeah.

568 00:24:03,700 --> 00:24:05,599 cancel my afternoon, teri.

569 00:24:05,600 --> 00:24:06,399 what? where are you going?

570 00:24:06,400 --> 00:24:09,270 pasadena. emergency client meeting.

571 00:24:09,800 --> 00:24:11,099 jane, we need to talk.

572 00:24:11,100 --> 00:24:14,250 hey, i need updated tax information -

573 00:24:15,900 --> 00:24:16,950 hello, jane.

574 00:24:17,500 --> 00:24:20,399 - fred, what are you doing? - what are you doing?

575 00:24:20,400 --> 00:24:22,334 - i'm going to talk to... - your mother?

576 00:24:22,335 --> 00:24:23,599 - ...my client. - no you're not.

577 00:24:23,600 --> 00:24:25,299 this is gonna get us both in trouble.

578 00:24:25,300 --> 00:24:27,934 fred, look, i know you're just doing your job,

579 00:24:27,935 --> 00:24:29,299 but what i really need from you

580 00:24:29,300 --> 00:24:33,640 is a little less guardian and a little more angel.

581 00:24:37,300 --> 00:24:39,300 ...and a guitar

582 00:24:39,400 --> 00:24:41,799 it's simple, but it gets me far

583 00:24:41,800 --> 00:24:44,184 my mother told me, don't complain

584 00:24:44,185 --> 00:24:46,699 'cause that's not what we're made of

585 00:24:46,700 --> 00:24:48,799 grew up on a crowded street

586 00:24:48,800 --> 00:24:51,499 well, i knew them, and they knew me

587 00:24:51,500 --> 00:24:55,599 i always thought i'd be something to be proud of

588 00:24:55,600 --> 00:24:59,200 ...hit open fire

589 00:24:59,400 --> 00:25:02,270 i took away everything you desire

590 00:25:04,500 --> 00:25:07,580 got love in my heart, got a melody

591 00:25:07,700 --> 00:25:10,399 smile on my face when i rip off the..

592 00:25:10,400 --> 00:25:12,434 got what i want, threw shoe*on my feet

593 00:25:12,435 --> 00:25:14,255 what else do i need?

594 00:26:36,700 --> 00:26:38,520 can i, uh, help you?

595 00:26:39,800 --> 00:26:42,665 i am so sorry, mr. dobkins. i -

596 00:26:42,700 --> 00:26:44,799 i assume you're here for a meeting with bobbi.

597 00:26:44,800 --> 00:26:47,900 yes. impromptu. it's last minute.

598 00:26:48,200 --> 00:26:50,534 but she wasn't here, and the door was open, so...

599 00:26:50,535 --> 00:26:52,199 do you want to wait?

600 00:26:52,200 --> 00:26:52,800 no.

601 00:26:53,500 --> 00:26:56,499 i could give her a message for you.

602 00:26:56,500 --> 00:26:57,900 could you, uh...

603 00:26:58,200 --> 00:26:59,670 could you just...

604 00:27:02,300 --> 00:27:04,680 just tell her i stopped by?

605 00:27:05,900 --> 00:27:08,000 - thanks. - ms. bingum...

606 00:27:09,000 --> 00:27:11,170 do you mind leaving that?

607 00:27:12,900 --> 00:27:14,100 oh. right.

608 00:27:15,900 --> 00:27:16,900 i'm sorry.

609 00:27:17,500 --> 00:27:20,400 that was inappropriate.

610 00:27:20,900 --> 00:27:22,099 i had no business.

611 00:27:22,100 --> 00:27:25,134 um, i just wanted to see what it felt like

612 00:27:25,135 --> 00:27:27,305 to wear one those things.

613 00:27:27,600 --> 00:27:31,450 for what it's worth, it looked nice on you.

614 00:27:33,300 --> 00:27:34,560 i have to go.

615 00:27:52,700 --> 00:27:55,899 next up, the crowd favorite, voted friendliest breed,

616 00:27:55,900 --> 00:27:57,650 the golden retriever.

617 00:27:58,200 --> 00:27:59,399 how was pasadena?

618 00:27:59,400 --> 00:28:01,599 both depressing and humiliating.

619 00:28:01,600 --> 00:28:03,070 oh, that's nice.

620 00:28:03,200 --> 00:28:04,799 what are you doing?

621 00:28:04,800 --> 00:28:06,299 is that the dog show?

622 00:28:06,300 --> 00:28:07,699 oh, i love me the pooches.

623 00:28:07,700 --> 00:28:10,399 i've always wanted to go, but that's not why i'm watching.

624 00:28:10,400 --> 00:28:12,799 kim's having all the assistants researching canine law

625 00:28:12,800 --> 00:28:14,699 and everything related to dog shows.

626 00:28:14,700 --> 00:28:16,799 i've never seen her do panic mode before.

627 00:28:16,800 --> 00:28:18,634 first one who finds something helpful to your case

628 00:28:18,635 --> 00:28:19,895 gets 50 bucks.

629 00:28:20,100 --> 00:28:21,990 that's right, chris...

630 00:28:22,600 --> 00:28:25,099 i think i just won 50 bucks.

631 00:28:25,100 --> 00:28:25,900 damn it!

632 00:28:32,900 --> 00:28:35,070 - how's it going? - ugh.

633 00:28:35,500 --> 00:28:40,099 well, i slept here last night, if that's any indication.

634 00:28:40,100 --> 00:28:41,699 i'm turning into you.

635 00:28:41,700 --> 00:28:44,134 ugh. this case - and the dog it rode in on -

636 00:28:44,135 --> 00:28:45,999 is a big stinking loser.

637 00:28:46,000 --> 00:28:46,899 there's nothing here.

638 00:28:46,900 --> 00:28:48,934 you should have let us go down in flames yesterday.

639 00:28:48,935 --> 00:28:49,985 well, maybe.

640 00:28:50,500 --> 00:28:52,999 but then we wouldn't have figured out how to win this case.

641 00:28:53,000 --> 00:28:54,734 oh, wake up, jane. we haven't.

642 00:28:54,735 --> 00:28:55,925 are you sure?

643 00:28:57,000 --> 00:28:59,899 look, check out this year's green-ribbon winner.

644 00:28:59,900 --> 00:29:03,399 so, you know, dogs are now my least favorite mammal.

645 00:29:03,400 --> 00:29:04,599 hey, is that david beckham?

646 00:29:04,600 --> 00:29:06,999 no, it's macbeth, a different golden retriever.

647 00:29:07,000 --> 00:29:09,599 but our client said that beckham was the only golden ever to win.

648 00:29:09,600 --> 00:29:11,899 what are the odds of another one coming along so quickly?

649 00:29:11,900 --> 00:29:13,199 i've never been very good at math,

650 00:29:13,200 --> 00:29:16,099 but something like eleventy-billion to one.

651 00:29:16,100 --> 00:29:18,399 mm. that's not a real number.

652 00:29:18,400 --> 00:29:23,720 look, i spent a lot of time on the pageant circuit as a kid.

653 00:29:24,300 --> 00:29:26,734 yes, i was in beauty pageants, kim.

654 00:29:26,735 --> 00:29:27,799 deal with it.

655 00:29:27,800 --> 00:29:29,934 parents will do anything to help their kids win,

656 00:29:29,935 --> 00:29:31,399 and dog owners are no different.

657 00:29:31,400 --> 00:29:32,934 get to the point, miss america.

658 00:29:32,935 --> 00:29:34,099 i'm saying...

659 00:29:34,100 --> 00:29:35,599 if you knew how to clone dogs

660 00:29:35,600 --> 00:29:38,699 ansomeone handed you an award-winning golden retriever,

661 00:29:38,700 --> 00:29:40,199 you could snag some extra dna

662 00:29:40,200 --> 00:29:42,999 and create a litter of pedigree pups.

663 00:29:43,000 --> 00:29:45,299 listen to yourself. it sounds crazy.

664 00:29:45,300 --> 00:29:47,680 do you have anything better?

665 00:29:47,800 --> 00:29:48,899 you should go down to the dog show

666 00:29:48,900 --> 00:29:51,334 and collect dna samples so we can run our own tests.

667 00:29:51,335 --> 00:29:53,645 ew. why don't you do it?

668 00:29:53,900 --> 00:29:56,280 'cause you're first chair...

669 00:29:56,300 --> 00:29:57,434 and i have another case.

670 00:29:57,435 --> 00:29:59,500 i can't go alone.

671 00:29:59,600 --> 00:30:04,570 ooh, take teri. she's always wanted to go to a dog show.

672 00:30:09,100 --> 00:30:10,499 this is a nightmare.

673 00:30:10,500 --> 00:30:13,090 it smells like a... dog show?

674 00:30:13,100 --> 00:30:15,799 don't make me leave you here alone.

675 00:30:15,800 --> 00:30:16,799 can i help you?

676 00:30:16,800 --> 00:30:17,850 i got this.

677 00:30:18,200 --> 00:30:20,234 hi, we're the editors of "doggie style,"

678 00:30:20,235 --> 00:30:22,699 doing a backstage profile on the show.

679 00:30:22,700 --> 00:30:24,450 ladies...my pleasure.

680 00:30:24,900 --> 00:30:26,199 i love your work.

681 00:30:26,200 --> 00:30:27,899 let me know if i can be of any service.

682 00:30:27,900 --> 00:30:29,230 go right ahead.

683 00:30:30,000 --> 00:30:32,999 "doggie style?" is that even a real magazine?

684 00:30:33,000 --> 00:30:35,730 yes, it's just not about dogs.

685 00:30:39,700 --> 00:30:41,100 there's macbeth.

686 00:30:42,100 --> 00:30:44,699 ...is now open for the agility invitational,

687 00:30:44,700 --> 00:30:47,799 held this year in minneapolis-st. paul.

688 00:30:47,800 --> 00:30:48,699 go for it.

689 00:30:48,700 --> 00:30:49,799 above my pay grade.

690 00:30:49,800 --> 00:30:52,600 besides, aren't you first chair?

691 00:30:59,900 --> 00:31:03,199 now what are we supposed to do? we have to collect its spit.

692 00:31:03,200 --> 00:31:04,699 - let him smell your nose. - what?

693 00:31:04,700 --> 00:31:07,499 distract him so i can get in there before he barks again.

694 00:31:07,500 --> 00:31:08,550 just do it.

695 00:31:18,500 --> 00:31:19,800 help...me.

696 00:31:20,900 --> 00:31:22,800 clean...me.

697 00:31:25,300 --> 00:31:26,799 you knew that would happen.

698 00:31:26,800 --> 00:31:27,990 i was hoping.

699 00:31:32,000 --> 00:31:34,100 why didn't you tell me?

700 00:31:34,400 --> 00:31:35,999 richard and i were not public yet,

701 00:31:36,000 --> 00:31:39,199 so i really did not feel comfortable telling you.

702 00:31:39,200 --> 00:31:41,399 so the affair is pretty recent.

703 00:31:41,400 --> 00:31:45,799 no, i've known richard for, uh, five or six years now.

704 00:31:45,800 --> 00:31:46,400 what?

705 00:31:47,800 --> 00:31:49,300 so when i was...

706 00:31:49,400 --> 00:31:52,099 when your daughter was still living at home?

707 00:31:52,100 --> 00:31:56,199 by the time she was in high school, my marriage was ovig.

708 00:31:56,200 --> 00:31:59,999 her father and i - we'd been growing apart for years,

709 00:32:00,000 --> 00:32:02,520 living parallel lives, really.

710 00:32:03,500 --> 00:32:05,799 so why'd you stay together?

711 00:32:05,800 --> 00:32:07,400 - for deb? - yes.

712 00:32:10,100 --> 00:32:12,034 she had this picture in her head

713 00:32:12,035 --> 00:32:14,415 of a perfect, loving family.

714 00:32:15,000 --> 00:32:16,799 we didn't want to take that away from her.

715 00:32:16,800 --> 00:32:20,599 all those years, deb thought you two were happy.

716 00:32:20,600 --> 00:32:23,799 you do it long enough, you get good at faking it.

717 00:32:23,800 --> 00:32:26,599 but at night, when you go to sleep,

718 00:32:26,600 --> 00:32:29,400 the lie will eat you up inside.

719 00:32:30,900 --> 00:32:33,099 oh, god, it feels good just to talk about it.

720 00:32:33,100 --> 00:32:34,360 what a relief.

721 00:32:35,400 --> 00:32:38,130 i feel like i can breath again.

722 00:32:40,800 --> 00:32:42,999 - jane, are you all right? - i can't be your lawyer.

723 00:32:43,000 --> 00:32:46,150 - e-excuse me? - this was a mistake.

724 00:32:46,300 --> 00:32:49,165 i never should have...

725 00:32:49,200 --> 00:32:52,700 you have to find yourself another lawyer.

726 00:33:12,100 --> 00:33:14,999 you're not thinking of jumping, are you?

727 00:33:15,000 --> 00:33:15,700 no.

728 00:33:17,100 --> 00:33:19,270 it wouldn't do any good.

729 00:33:21,000 --> 00:33:22,680 i'm sorry, grayson.

730 00:33:22,900 --> 00:33:25,840 i hope i didn't screw things up.

731 00:33:26,200 --> 00:33:27,180 it's fine.

732 00:33:28,200 --> 00:33:30,899 parker stepped in. all the assets are on the table.

733 00:33:30,900 --> 00:33:32,399 it's an easy 50/50 split.

734 00:33:32,400 --> 00:33:34,899 so now that i am no longer opposing counsel

735 00:33:34,900 --> 00:33:38,499 and the chinese wall has completely crumbled,

736 00:33:38,500 --> 00:33:41,999 can you tell me something totally off the record?

737 00:33:42,000 --> 00:33:43,120 what's that?

738 00:33:43,500 --> 00:33:44,899 why didn't joe tell bobbi

739 00:33:44,900 --> 00:33:47,699 he was seeing a lawyer about the divorce?

740 00:33:47,700 --> 00:33:51,130 why did he keep it secret for so long?

741 00:33:52,500 --> 00:33:55,790 joe came to see me a few months ago,

742 00:33:56,000 --> 00:33:57,499 said his marriage was over,

743 00:33:57,500 --> 00:33:59,899 and it was time to file for a did rce.

744 00:33:59,900 --> 00:34:03,299 thing is, the timing wasn't so good for me.

745 00:34:03,300 --> 00:34:04,100 for you?

746 00:34:05,000 --> 00:34:08,780 i was just about to ask deb to marry me...

747 00:34:10,800 --> 00:34:13,499 and you didn't want anything to ruin it.

748 00:34:13,500 --> 00:34:16,999 - i know it sounds selfish. - it's sounds sweet...

749 00:34:17,000 --> 00:34:18,000 and kind.

750 00:34:19,600 --> 00:34:22,799 no, maybe i should have just told deb.

751 00:34:22,800 --> 00:34:27,560 for what it's worth, i think what you did was amazing.

752 00:34:28,400 --> 00:34:30,360 deb was a lucky woman.

753 00:34:45,800 --> 00:34:47,999 and what are we doing out here?

754 00:34:48,000 --> 00:34:51,099 we just thought you might want to settle.

755 00:34:51,100 --> 00:34:52,884 ms. kaswell, in about two seconds,

756 00:34:52,885 --> 00:34:54,376 we're going to walk through that door,

757 00:34:54,377 --> 00:34:55,834 and the judge is going to announce

758 00:34:55,835 --> 00:34:57,499 a verdict in our favor.

759 00:34:57,500 --> 00:34:59,299 why in the hell would we want to settle?

760 00:34:59,300 --> 00:35:01,890 we'll give you three reasons.

761 00:35:04,700 --> 00:35:05,820 they've been

762 00:35:06,500 --> 00:35:08,300 hiding all my life

763 00:35:08,335 --> 00:35:10,100 but until now

764 00:35:10,300 --> 00:35:12,190 love's been on strike

765 00:35:12,200 --> 00:35:13,670 ever since you...

766 00:35:14,200 --> 00:35:15,300 oh, god.

767 00:35:15,600 --> 00:35:17,100 so, darling

768 00:35:17,600 --> 00:35:19,630 can i buy you a drink?

769 00:35:19,900 --> 00:35:24,199 i'd like you to meet macbeth, coach, and big papi.

770 00:35:24,200 --> 00:35:25,934 turns out your genius of a client

771 00:35:25,935 --> 00:35:27,399 didn't make just one clone

772 00:35:27,400 --> 00:35:29,199 from mr. haft's award-winning beckham.

773 00:35:29,200 --> 00:35:31,799 without our client's knowledge or consent, he made four.

774 00:35:31,800 --> 00:35:33,399 he gave puppy number one to mr. haft

775 00:35:33,400 --> 00:35:37,530 and sold the other three to the highest bidders.

776 00:35:37,900 --> 00:35:38,999 you can't prove anything.

777 00:35:39,000 --> 00:35:40,399 oh, actually, we can.

778 00:35:40,400 --> 00:35:42,899 dna tests from the same lab you guys used.

779 00:35:42,900 --> 00:35:46,050 you're right. they know their stuff.

780 00:35:46,200 --> 00:35:48,899 the judge is ready. court's in session.

781 00:35:48,900 --> 00:35:50,580 decision time, boys.

782 00:35:50,700 --> 00:35:53,634 either we settle, or we walk macbeth, coach, and big papi

783 00:35:53,635 --> 00:35:54,699 down to the d. a.'s office,

784 00:35:54,700 --> 00:35:57,599 where we'll have a little talk about fraud and grand larceny.

785 00:35:57,600 --> 00:35:59,420 ooh, that'll be fun.

786 00:36:02,400 --> 00:36:05,899 could you let the judge know we'll need a few minutes?

787 00:36:05,900 --> 00:36:08,770 why don't we talk... in private?

788 00:36:19,300 --> 00:36:20,800 congratulations!

789 00:36:21,100 --> 00:36:22,399 - we won? - yup.

790 00:36:22,400 --> 00:36:24,199 they're filling out the paperwork right now.

791 00:36:24,200 --> 00:36:25,530 wow. thank you.

792 00:36:25,600 --> 00:36:29,499 and as soon as you return the dog, they'll refund your money.

793 00:36:29,500 --> 00:36:30,100 what?

794 00:36:30,200 --> 00:36:32,020 it's how this works.

795 00:36:32,300 --> 00:36:35,384 it's no different than a broken refrigerator or a bum stereo.

796 00:36:35,385 --> 00:36:38,499 to get your money back, you've got to return the merchandise.

797 00:36:38,500 --> 00:36:41,299 they think david beckham is merchandise?

798 00:36:41,300 --> 00:36:43,000 under the law, yes.

799 00:36:43,600 --> 00:36:45,499 well, what's gonna happen to -

800 00:36:45,500 --> 00:36:46,200 to him?

801 00:36:47,100 --> 00:36:49,734 i don't know. you wanted the money, right?

802 00:36:49,735 --> 00:36:50,699 you said it yourself.

803 00:36:50,700 --> 00:36:53,434 this dog doesn't listen to you. he's totally untrainable.

804 00:36:53,435 --> 00:36:54,999 he doesn't do anything.

805 00:36:55,000 --> 00:36:57,699 this dog never leaves my side. do you know that?

806 00:36:57,700 --> 00:36:59,499 he knows where i am every second of the day.

807 00:36:59,500 --> 00:37:02,000 he's not david beckham i.

808 00:37:02,200 --> 00:37:04,500 no, he definitely is not.

809 00:37:05,800 --> 00:37:09,299 david beckham i would never just sit here with...

810 00:37:09,300 --> 00:37:10,899 his head on my lap.

811 00:37:10,900 --> 00:37:13,199 he'd be sitting in an alert position.

812 00:37:13,200 --> 00:37:16,099 david beckham i knew he couldn't come into my bedroom.

813 00:37:16,100 --> 00:37:19,599 but this guy - he can't wait to wake me up in the morning.

814 00:37:19,600 --> 00:37:22,330 he just jumps right in my bed.

815 00:37:22,600 --> 00:37:24,599 and now you must think i'm an idiot.

816 00:37:24,600 --> 00:37:26,334 i mean, to turn down that kind of money, but -

817 00:37:26,335 --> 00:37:27,455 i understand.

818 00:37:27,900 --> 00:37:29,440 unconditional love.

819 00:37:30,800 --> 00:37:33,499 they say you can't put a price on that, right?

820 00:37:33,500 --> 00:37:35,700 listen, no promises,

821 00:37:36,100 --> 00:37:38,134 but perhaps if we agree to keep the details

822 00:37:38,135 --> 00:37:40,199 of the settlement completely confidential,

823 00:37:40,200 --> 00:37:42,934 bff will allow you to keep david beckham

824 00:37:42,935 --> 00:37:45,385 and still refund your money.

825 00:37:45,800 --> 00:37:46,400 okay.

826 00:37:47,200 --> 00:37:47,830 well...

827 00:37:50,200 --> 00:37:51,950 that would be great.

828 00:37:52,000 --> 00:37:55,290 but whatever happens, i'm keeping him.

829 00:38:02,900 --> 00:38:05,900 - hey. - uh-oh.

830 00:38:06,100 --> 00:38:08,099 this isn't gonna go well for me, is it?

831 00:38:08,100 --> 00:38:10,099 you can tell all that by the way i said "hey"?

832 00:38:10,100 --> 00:38:13,500 - i've been here before. - hank...

833 00:38:14,600 --> 00:38:17,199 you seem like a really nice guy.

834 00:38:17,200 --> 00:38:19,720 yep, that's what comes next.

835 00:38:19,900 --> 00:38:21,299 i am a nice guy, jane.

836 00:38:21,300 --> 00:38:24,099 i thought you were figuring that out.

837 00:38:24,100 --> 00:38:26,299 it seemed like we had a really nice time together.

838 00:38:26,300 --> 00:38:27,840 i'm sure we did.

839 00:38:28,500 --> 00:38:30,600 i mean, i know we did.

840 00:38:30,900 --> 00:38:33,499 and i'm not ruling anything out.

841 00:38:33,500 --> 00:38:37,630 great. do you want to go to the movies tonight?

842 00:38:37,800 --> 00:38:39,200 the truth is...

843 00:38:42,100 --> 00:38:45,400 - ...there's somebody else. - ouch.

844 00:38:47,900 --> 00:38:50,840 no way around that one, is there?


is he in love with you?


he doesn't know i exist.


look, if you change your mind,


i- it's just a movie, not a lifetime commitment, okay?


- thanks, but... - maybe another time.


well, looks like it all worked out.


no thanks to me.


if only someone,


in a guardian capacity, had warned you beforehand.


fred...


down here on earth, no one likes to hear "i told you so."


but i admit i should have listened.


is thatwhat you want to hear?


yeah, pretty much.


well, i'm off.


what are you doing?


"say anything..." 1989.


john cusack wins the hearts of america with a song...


and a giant boom box.

i don't care what you say. i'm taking a shot with this one.


you know what?


go for it.


good luck, fred.


how is this one shining on its own?


so many answers i will never know


so many answers i will never know

our world is beautiful


but i think it would be nothing without you

life is wonderful, it moves my soul

fred?


- hey, stacy. - hi.


i thought that was you. whatcha doing?


uh, just, uh, hanging out.


well, see you around.

yes, you will.

life is wonderful, it moves my soul


she remembers my name.


our world is beautiful


but i think it would be nothing without you


oh, my god, i'm nothing without you


am i interrupting?


no... bobbi, please come in.


well, everything is signed, and...


i'm divorced.


how do you feel?


anxious.


but i'll be okay.


i'm really sorry about the way i behaved.


it all worked out.


and despite everything,


i really did enjoy working with you.


you didn't just care about the case.

you seemed to care about me.


till i went a little nuts.


about that - can i ask what happened?


did i do something?

i- i think...


you reminded me of my own mother.


it felt a little close to hom

she is lucky to have you as a daughter.


goodbye, jane.


goodbye, mom.

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